Kenyan Conductors; Questions you regret ever asking the matatu touts. See this...

Kenyan Conductors; Questions you regret ever asking the matatu touts. See this hilarious responses.


It is only in Kenya where politeness is a non-existing word for the Matatu touts.

They will hesitate with your change just to see your reaction and if you forget, well that’s luck for them.

They are the only people who will insult you if you refuse to board their vehicles and charge you differently from what they had announced on stage.

See these responses from our touts,probably you have heard some and they might have used this vulgar language on you

Question: An old woman;Wekeni nyimbo za yesu

Tout       :Mathee, Yesu bado hajatoa album

Question:Apassenger; Kuna kiti

Tout       :Hao wengine wamekalia ndoo?

Question: Passenger; Kuna kiti ama ni uongo zenu

Tout       : Hehe kama ulikua unaogopa kukosa kiti si ungebeba yako.

Question: Bwana hii gari ina joto sana!

Tout       : Basi shuka upande fridge.

Tout       : Madam, kuna seat pale nyuma.

Passenger: Siwezi kaa seats za nyuma. Nataka seat ya mbele.

Tout       : Kwani za nyuma ziko nje ya gari? Basi wacha dereva ashuke ukae mbele.

Passenger: Tao ngapi
Tout        : Mbao
Passenger: Niko na kumi
Tout        : Iyo nunua avocado ujipake uteleze mpaka tao.
Passenger: Dereva ongeza volume tuskie Mwalimu King’ang’i
Tout        : Ungeskia mwalimu wa shule ungekua na gari yako si kutusumbua hapa na King’ang’i.

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